The New Luxury: Why High-Achieving Women Are Trading 5-Star Hotels for Transformational Retreats

I was sitting across from him at dinner when he ended it.

Not the dramatic, explosive ending you see in movies. Just a quiet statement that landed like a punch: “I don’t think this is working.”

I had thought I’d marry him. I had built a life around the idea of us. And in one conversation, it was over.

But in hindsight, the breakup was a gift…

I had been happy enough. I loved him. I really did. On paper, everything looked right. But I wasn’t lit up. I wasn’t inspired. I wasn’t feeling that electric aliveness I knew I was capable of.

I was sitting in the passenger seat in my own life. And I didn’t even realize it until he was gone.

When Success Doesn’t Feel Like Success

By most measures, I was a successful, high-achiever. I had built a profitable marketing startup. I was making great money freelancing for two public relations agencies. I could work remotely and traveled frequently. I had a beautiful, light-filled apartment in New York City’s Upper East Side. I had an amazing community of friends. I had the freedom, the income, the lifestyle that I’d worked so hard to create. From the outside, everything looked like it was working.

But on the inside? I felt like a stranger in my own life.

In my opinion, success on the outside looks like money, wealth, external beauty, achievement, metrics, results. Success on the inside feels like peace, coming home, embodiment of your values.

I had the former. I was desperately missing the latter.

After the breakup, I realized (yet again) that I couldn’t be “saved” by anything or anyone outside of myself. Not a relationship. Not the next business milestone. Not the next achievement I could check off my list.

So I went back to the basics of what lit me up. And a retreat I attended as a guest showed me the way back to myself.

The Shift That’s Happening

I’m not alone in this realization. Something significant is shifting in how high-achieving women are choosing to invest their time and money.

A market report by Market.US states: “The Wellness Retreat Market was valued at USD 183.8 billion in 2024, projected to reach USD 371.8 billion by 2034, with a CAGR of 7.3%.” Meanwhile, traditional hotel bookings dropped nearly 8% in early 2025 compared to the year before as reported by HotelHub.

Women everywhere are waking up to the same truth I discovered: there’s a profound difference between escape and transformation.

And they’re choosing transformation.

Redefining What Luxury Actually Means

Let me be clear: there is absolutely nothing wrong with a gorgeous spa day, beautiful cocktails, exquisite food, and a stunning hotel room. I love those things. There’s a time and place for luxurious vacations.

But here’s what I’ve learned: there’s a type of self-care that feels more fulfilling than luxury travel.

To me, real self-care is personal development and growth. Real self-care is learning from masters of wellness and health who can teach you tools you’ll use for the rest of your life. Real self-care is being in community with women who understand you, who are also committed to growth, who won’t let you sit in the passenger seat in your own life anymore.

Real self-care is finding your way back to yourself.

The spa day makes you feel good for a weekend. The transformational retreat changes how you show up in your life, permanently.

That’s the new luxury. Not what you escape from, but what you return to.

Why External Goals Feel So Empty

When you’re disconnected from your heart, no amount of achievement will ever feel like enough.

I know this intimately. I kept chasing the next milestone, thinking that would be the thing that made me feel whole. The next revenue goal. The next relationship milestone. The next external validation.

But you can’t figure out your purpose when you’re out of tune with yourself. You can’t hear what your heart is calling you toward when you’re operating on autopilot, going through the motions, accepting “happy enough” as good enough.

Purpose doesn’t come from external achievement. It comes from internal alignment.

And that requires you to stop, to get quiet, to reconnect with who you actually are underneath all the roles and responsibilities and expectations.

That’s what transformational retreats create space for. Not just relaxation. Not just a temporary pause from your regular life. But actual reconnection to the truest version of yourself.

After my first yoga retreat which led to my immense transformation, I decided to create more spaces for others to feel this shifts. And thus, the Thrive Collective was born. 

What Makes These Experiences Different

At Thrive Collective, the retreats I curate bring together some of the most skilled practitioners in the wellness world. Yoga teachers who understand that movement is medicine. Nutritionists and healers who help you rebuild your relationship with your body. Dating coaches who teach you how to stop settling. Hypnotherapists who help you reprogram limiting beliefs. Manifestation mentors who show you how to create from alignment instead of force.

These aren’t just feel-good workshops. They’re taught by masters who have dedicated their lives to understanding how transformation actually works. And they’re giving you tools you can use long after the retreat ends.

But here’s what might be the most powerful element: community.

There’s something that happens when you gather women who are all committed to growth, who are all done with “fine,” who are all ready to stop performing and start being real.

You realize you’re not alone. You realize the things you’ve been ashamed of or hiding are actually shared experiences. You witness other women being vulnerable, which gives you permission to do the same.

And those connections? They don’t end when the retreat does. You’re building a network of women who will continue to support your growth, who will call you out when you’re settling, who will remind you of who you are when you forget.

The Transformations I’ve Witnessed

At our last retreat at Lake Atitlan in Guatemala, I watched women completely shift.

One guest completely transformed her thinking about herself. She quit a toxic job and transitioned into a new role with a startup that lights her up. She also reconnected with a man who she now knows is the one—after spending the retreat processing her emotions about a super toxic ex. After the retreat, that ex texted her, and she felt nothing. The hold he had on her was gone.

Another woman was finally able to get in touch with her own emotions after spending years caring for everyone else. She had become so disconnected from herself that she didn’t even know what she wanted anymore. By the end of the week, she was laughing, crying, feeling fully alive in her own skin again.

These aren’t small shifts. These are life-altering transformations that ripple out into every area of their lives: their careers, their relationships, their health, their sense of purpose.

You can’t get that from a week at a five-star hotel, no matter how beautiful the property or how excellent the service.

The Setting Matters

There’s a reason we host these retreats in some of the most energetically potent places on Earth.

Volcanic lakes. Sacred mountains. Ocean shores. Places that cultures around the world have long recognized as powerful.

When you remove yourself from your usual environment, the home where certain patterns are reinforced, the city where you’re in constant doing mode, you create space for something new to emerge.

These settings invite presence. They remind you that you’re part of something larger than your to-do list. They offer a perspective that’s nearly impossible to access from inside your regular life.

And when you combine that environment with expert guidance and intentional community, transformation becomes not just possible but inevitable.

Who This Is For

These retreats attract a specific kind of woman.

She’s successful by external measures but knows something deeper is calling. She’s achieved goals she once thought would make her happy, only to discover that happiness is more complex than achievement.

She’s tired of performing. She’s ready to remember who she is beneath the roles and responsibilities.

She wants her outer life to reflect her inner truth, not the other way around.

She’s done with “happy enough.” She wants to feel alive.

She values community but is selective about where she invests her energy. She’s looking for depth, not small talk. She wants to be around women who won’t settle for surface-level connection.

And crucially, she’s ready. Not perfect. Not healed. Not already transformed. Just ready to stop sitting in the passenger seat in her own life.

What I Know Now

That breakup? It was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

Not because the relationship was wrong (though it wasn’t right). But because it forced me to confront a question I had been avoiding:

What does MY version of “alive” actually look like?

Not the abstract concept. Not what it’s supposed to look like. But the real, tangible, everyday life version.

For me, aliveness looks like waking up inspired instead of going through the motions. Making decisions from my gut instead of from fear of disappointing someone. Feeling like the main character in my own life instead of a supporting role. That electric feeling of “YES” in my body instead of “this is fine.”

Your version of aliveness probably looks completely different.

Maybe it’s waking up without that pit in your stomach about money. Maybe it’s being present with your kids instead of consumed by an endless to-do list. Maybe it’s creating work you’re proud of instead of work that just pays the bills. Maybe it’s speaking your truth instead of editing yourself in every conversation.

Here’s what I know for certain: The struggle you’re in right now is showing you exactly what you desire. The thing you’re tired of tolerating is pointing you toward what you’re ready to claim.

The Real ROI

Let’s talk about return on investment.

A luxury hotel stay might cost a few thousand dollars. A transformational retreat might cost the same, or possibly more. On the surface, the value proposition seems similar.

But look deeper.

The hotel stay offers temporary relief. Beautiful distractions. A brief pause from your regular life.

The transformational retreat offers tools you’ll use forever. Community that continues to support you. Clarity about what you actually want. And most importantly: reconnection to yourself.

Which one is actually a luxury?

The Invitation

I don’t know where you’re sitting passenger seat in your own life right now. But I know you can feel it.

Maybe it’s a relationship that’s “fine” but not fulfilling. Maybe it’s a career that pays well but doesn’t light you up. Maybe it’s a version of yourself you’ve been performing for so long that you’ve forgotten who you actually are.

The real luxury isn’t escaping that feeling. It’s doing something about it.

It’s choosing to invest in the kind of growth that actually changes your life. It’s surrounding yourself with women who are also committed to evolution. It’s learning from masters who can teach you tools you’ll carry forever. It’s giving yourself permission to want more than “happy enough.”

Your dream life isn’t waiting for you to be ready. It’s inviting you in right now, exactly as you are.

The question isn’t whether you deserve transformation or whether you have time for it.

The question is whether you’re willing to choose it.

Because here’s what high-achieving women everywhere are discovering: we weren’t meant to sit in the passenger seat in our own lives.

We’re meant to drive.

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